Sunday, 17 June 2018

Becoming A Father For The First Time #DadsUnplugged

'Giving birth completes a woman' - that's a long-lived belief in society, especially in the Indian society. Yes, motherhood adds a new meaning to the life of a woman, but actually there is lesser conversation around the man who is equally involved. When I heard these gentlemen opening up and getting candid with their experiences of being a father in #dadsunplugged film by Himalaya Baby Care, it simply triggered me to document my journey how I felt when this moment came to my life. 
This series beautifully captures fathers expressing their emotion of joy, fear, apprehensions, and confusion that they encountered in the process to create a new identity while exploring the world of fatherhood. I'm sure most fathers would relate to the anecdotes of these dads like I did...
The news of my wife expecting a baby gave me a sense of fulfilment as a man. My chest was swollen with pride. After a few days, the panic popped up that I'll be now be responsible for another human being forever. For the next few days, it was a weird mix of feelings that left me emotionally drained and I couldn't dare to share with my wife what sort of state my mind was in. I would daydream to be ready for rushing to the hospital at a moment’s notice and people congratulating me on being a father. The entire concept of fatherhood seemed utterly alien to which I was unable to comprehend.

It took me really good time for sufficient mental preparation, but those anxiety pangs somehow switched to more of responsible moves one fine day, when looking at my wife I realised it is her first time too and she needs a stronger, supportive and more patient version of her husband now. Needless to say, the idealistic vision of the moment was a game changer and I started counting back to figure out when would I hold the tiny bundle of joy in my arms.

The birth of my child was terrifying but miraculous. The condition, in which my wife was rushed to emergency much earlier than the EDD, left me panicking that she won't survive this life-threatening phase. For a moment, I even regretted our decision of planning a baby. After a five hours long C-section, the skin and bone being was presented to me in a human form. The dull screams of my son announced its arrival to our world. 
Today on the occasion of #FathersDay, I look back on that day thankful and would just say "Dear son! I confess I didn't come programmed with great parenting skills, but your love has made me learn at every step along the way. Life now feels enriched with you around and all my worries melt away when I see you smile. No hurdle seems too difficult for a reward so big that is 'You'."

Happy Father's Day to all the dads and dads-to-be!

As expressed by-
-Amit-

62 comments:

  1. What a brilliant post for father's day. It's interesting the way that being a father changed you. Apparently a man's hormones change not long after he carries his child in his arms. It's something that scientists have measured. Then long after their children have grown and they become grandparents, as soon as they hold their grandchildren the hormonal change happens in them again, but this time it's an instant change, snapping them straight back in time to when they were looking after their own children. Amazing.

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    1. Thanks Dom! the change that I've talked about is not hormonal but about the way of thinking and taking fatherhood.

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  2. This is a great post about pregnancy based on the husband's perspective. CHildren are one of the best blessings in life. Happy father's day to you!

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    1. yeah, and the birth of first child transforms u as a person.

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  3. What an incredible story! I love this blog post and seeing such dedicated and involved fathers who will teach their sons to be the same. Wonderful!

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    1. Thank you so much for your kind appreciation.

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  4. Wow! This was so raw and beautiful to read! Your son sure is lucky to have such an amazing and thoughtful father to take the time to write this. Happy belated Father's Day!

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    1. It made my day, Isabella! Thanks for lovely wishes.

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  5. What a beautiful post and wonderful tribute to your wife and son. I think you've already managed to become Father of the Year if the truth be told. Fantastic and timely due to Father's Day!

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    1. aww, that feels so special like getting awarded.

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  6. How wonderful that you posted from your true thoughts, fears and realizations. Having a child can wake up those sleeping anxiety monsters, although, logic thought and the feelings that come about when you first hold your child in your arms send that anxiety packing.

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    1. I'm delighted that you could relate to the feelings :)

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  7. This article is the most heart-warming one I have read in quite sometime. Yes we seldom care or think of the man who is equally responsible for our growing up as our moms. An article from their perspective is quite rare and worthy of reading and sharing.

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  8. Oh thank you for sharing with us your story of fatherhood, it was absolutely amazing and raw. I can only image the feelings, emotions and joy that comes with being a father, especially for the first time.

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    1. It's actually hard to express what you feel, but i tried.
      Amit

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  9. this was such a sweet post! It's so uncommon to see articles like this from the father's perspective. happy father's day!

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    1. Thanks for your wishes!
      Glad you liked reading it.

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  10. Such a sweet and heart warming story. I think the emotions of a father to be are extremely under rated in our society as the entire focus is on the mother to be and the expected baby. Enjoyed reading this experience.

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  11. What a wonderful father's day post filled with emotions! Glad to see that you've embraced the lighter side and shared your story.

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  12. what a lovely story! I agree noone comes programed with great parenting skills but we learn along the way!

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  13. What a lovely story here. Amazing fathers are the best! They deserve all the accolades.

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    1. Oh yes! all fathers do deserve accolades.

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  14. This is a beautiful and emotional story! So glad it is documented your feelings as this is something to remember for the rest of your life!

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    1. Undoubtedly, it's once in a lifetime experience.

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  15. This is such a sweet and heart melting story. So glad you have everything going for you.

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  16. Beautifully expressed emotions and very well written. Love the ending lines of the post.

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  17. Such a great story, thank you for sharing. I can only imagine what an amazing feeling is to be parents.

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    1. It's actually a feeling that is cherished forever

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  18. This is nice post, it was nice for you to share your perspective as Father too.

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  19. Such a beautifully written post. Happy to see dad talk about parenting and taking the charge.

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  20. Fathers definitely have lots of emotions going on when they are about to become a dad. It’s such a big change for them as well!

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    1. Very true. But this fact is rarely acknowledged.

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  21. Happy Father's day and totally love the fact when fathers are so hands on and involved in every kids activity. It is a big responsibility for them as well.

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    1. No doubt. Both mom and dad need to be equally involved.

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  22. Ruth-Ann RidleyJune 21, 2018 12:49 am

    I know my husband wa so excited when our little ones were coming! It’s such an awesome feeling!

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    1. We always want to relive those feelings

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  23. This is a heart warming post. Beautifully written just in time for Father's Day.

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  24. This is such a lovely story and a good read. Very beautifully express! Happy belated father's day to you!

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  25. It's great that fathers can take time to express how they feel about being fathers. It's refreshing and encouraging to hear! Happy Father's day!

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    1. it actually is something that we don't notice often.

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  26. What a heartwarming story. Parenthood is an exciting journey, its a blessing! Thank you for opening your hearts to us.

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    1. It felt great sharing my story with my readers.

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  27. You are courageous in blogging what you really feel as a father. Now, after reading your post, it makes me think if my husband thought the same way too.

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    1. Actually men do feel almost this way, but are hesitant to express.

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  28. This is a lovely, heartwarming blog post that I enjoyed reading. Hope you had a great Father’s Day!

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  29. Such a heartfelt post on father's on Father's Day! Loved reading it so much.

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  30. Such an interesting post! I don’t think society ever thinks about a mans feeling as much as the women’s feeling during pregnancy/fatherhood because the women is the one that carries and is usually the nurturer. However, the man does go through emotional feelings because it’s a life changing experience for him as well! Such a good post about the mans perspective!

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    1. Yeah, this is why I thought of grabbing this opportunity to have my say on this Father's day.
      Amit

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  31. what a wonderful feeling, I am a mother and know the grand feeling of that but recently had a son of mine adopt a child with his wife and watching that was awesome.

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    1. I appreciate and admire the noble decision to adopt a child.

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